My chinky chinese eyelashes.

I think I’m falling sick. I have a bigass sore throat, my neck’s aching and my abdomen is making strange noises. It might have something to do with my Chili’s cajun chicken sandwich (it’s not a burger, Peter!) last night. The moment I tasted the heavenly deep fried onions, I knew my throat would swell up the to size of bull’s testicles.

I was experimenting with fake eyelashes last night. Being a cheapskate, I went to Guardian and got it at RM8 a pop. I was very excited about using them, having endured 21 years of my life living day to day in a super chinky existence.


The fake lashes. Will explain why missing one later.


The glue that came with it

So I got up and got working. I measured the fake lashes by putting it on top of my own chinky lashes. Then I cut it to an appropriate length. Then I stuck it onto my eyelid.

More like I tried like hell to stick it onto my eyelid. When I opened the tiny bottle of glue, a whiff of industrial super glue smell hit my nostrils. I was a bit skeptical about lacing that stuff on my eyes but I thought, hey I should trust Guardian. Didn’t matter there wasn’t any instruction in English. Guardian is best.

Fat chance.

Number 1, the glue took some bloody long time to dry. Number 2, the cheap plastic lashes and my eyelids didn’t seem to be good contact surfaces. Number 3, I lost the right lashes to breeze from the fan. Number 4, I had a scare when my eyelids were glued shut together for a couple of seconds.

It was a horrendous experience to say the least. Anyway, I persevered, finally got them to stay and I realised that people don’t have lashes on the centre of the eyelids.



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