LIES ALL LIES!

Women who can look good while cooking. How do they do it?

While they chop, boil and whisk in clean feminine dresses, perfect posture with hair perfectly coiffed & nails perfectly manicured, I am trying to balance multiple beads of sweat on my flat Asian nose hoping they won’t fall into the damned batter.

Even when they are frazzled, they get frazzled so stylishly.

Cue, boyfriend’s shirt falling off the shoulders, revealing just enough.

Cue, single pearl of sweat, which only runs down one’s cleavage but nowhere else.

Cue, clean fingers pushing soft, voluminous hair away from delicate forehead.

HOW DO THEY DO IT? Is there a school that I could go to!?

# – Seriously?

When I cook, I wear the ugliest t-shirt I can get my hands on because I won’t feel bad if it gets soiled.

I do wear boyfriend’s husband’s t-shirts, but only because they’re free and loose and comfortable.

I tie my hair up because it’s warm though I wish it could look fashionable, it doesn’t.

I wear a hairnet so I won’t get poked in the eye by a stray strand while pouring hot liquid into a different bowl.

I wear a bandanna sometimes to prevent my sweat from contaminating the food.

Have I mentioned that I wear a hairnet?

# – A scene of horror. Pic from Huai Bin.

Please tell me I’m not alone -_-

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Gawd everytime I scroll down and see the kitchen picture above I freak myself out. So here’s one where I don’t freak myself out so much :P

29 thoughts on “LIES ALL LIES!”

  1. You are not alone SISTAH! That is why I hate manicures, I can never keep them on with out seasoning the food with a spinkle of OPI. I do sometimes use make up but it ends up oily. Good ventilation helps with the hair and oily skin. A tip, perhaps a cute apron? Dark colored on preferably to hide the oil, spice sweat and blood stain.

  2. that’s why my godma warned me NOT to become a housewife even after marriage.

    “don’t so stupid like me wear ugly t-shirt at home everyday”. that’s what exactly she told.

    noted. i said.

  3. You’re definitely not the only one. Though I don’t enter the kitchen often, when I do, I abandon all though of self-presentation, soil the clothes I’m wearing, and have my hair pushed into a beautiful porcupine-style.

  4. :) YOU are SO not alone. Wear an apron, preferable one that’s washable. Always got hair tied back.. I prefer the term err.. “scruffy chic” myself.. :) Its so hot here leh, I’d rather be more comfortable cooking and feeding the pack of monkeys :) besides they get to help too!

    Those ladies can pause and re-do make up and all that.. no way I’d look like that either.. but I do have kitchen/pantry envy though!

  5. Not as if there’s a camera pointing at you while you’re in your kitchen anyway. So why should you care? hehe

    Besides, your food is awesome, and that’s what matters! :D

  6. i usually wear a singlet and boxers combo in the kitchen. with hair messily tied up. damn sexy. i also usually ban the significant other from entering until the dish is done. greasy and frazzled really isn’t a good look for any lady. -_-“

  7. Real women don’t dress like that (ala Nigella, Sophie Dahl etc.) when they cook. I remember one very hot Sunday afternoon slaving in the kitchen cooking a 5 course dinner for too many guests I invited in a moment of insanity. It got so hot and sweaty, I ended up cooking in my swimsuit. When my husband saw me he thought I was trying to be all sexy and seductive in the kitchen. I think he got the message when I burst into a hysterical – Hurryup……..! go put on your Speedos and come downstairs and help me cook! Sure I looked hot, but only in the most crazed and dishevelled way.

    Sometimes when I watch these cooking shows with all the cleavage flashing, batting of lashes, the come hither stare, mood music and steamy soft focus lens, I can’t help but wonder if the director/camerman/producer used to work in the porn industry before deciding on going mainstream. Seriously.

  8. You know, I honestly think you look better in the first photo than in the second one. Swear to God.

    In the kitchen photo you look great even without makeup and all that – it’s natural beauty, the kind where you look awesome anywhere, anytime without having to work at it.

    Few people have it, you’ve got it, so stop complaining woman. :D

  9. Nope you are not at all alone. As much as i love cooking, i cringe at my kitchen pictures. And i think it’s because the camera shoots us sideways in our big tees from our teenage years, rather than from the front, with us in cute low cut dresses =)

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