Do unto others as you would have them do to you – the parenting edition.

I was just going to post this on FB but felt it’s a bit too long. So here we go…


Since finding out that we’re going to become parents ourselves, I have begun to realise, more than ever, how important it is to work on my personal attitude, my perspective towards life, my views of other people and my words.

It is important because I realise that whatever I do or say will inevitably affect my children.

If I were negative, they will grow up to be negative. If I had no manners, they will grow up with no manners. If I were lazy, they will become lazy. If I had no opinions, they will become spineless. If I continued cussing, they will grow up cussing a lot. If I made life decisions without researching and studying, they too will become hasty and stupid with their decisions in life. If I lived a mediocre life, I sure as hell shouldn’t expect them to miraculously become the creme de la creme of society. If I lived a life of blaming others, they will blame me in return.

Giving birth is not noble, it doesn’t take a genius to get knocked up and push a baby out.

A child does not choose to be born, you force them into this world and thus you willingly shoulder the burden of raising them. Don’t act like you did them a favour.

And that’s why, children owe parents nothing. Not time, not service and certainly not money.

Whatever that children give to their parents when they’re old are given out of love, not because they owe the parents anything. So ask yourself, have you raised your children with love?

Have you given them the tools to be independent adults with financial knowledge before expecting a monthly allowance? Have you given them the positivity, support and encouragement before demanding them to spend time with you? Have you instilled in them the importance of loyalty before demanding the same from them? Have you politely conversed with them before getting upset with them for speaking rudely to you?

Oh, you worked hard to pay for your kids’ toys and school? Well done, you.


Some parents wonder why their children dislike being with them. Well, I wonder whether these parents have reflected on themselves?

Have you been a nice, positive person that doesn’t zap off someone’s energy? Have you been kind and encouraging? Have you been emotionally supportive? Have you been polite?

A friend told me she mentioned to her parents that she got a raise, cause she wanted to share her good news. Instead of being proud and happy for her daughter, her parents told her she could now give them more money. And they wonder why the daughter doesn’t want to talk to them much.

A mother complains that her son in her 20s speaks really rudely to her. I told her to be patient, until I saw for myself how she spoke to that son and her other children. Well, lets just say children take after their parents.

I don’t expect our kids to take care of us when we’re old and frail but if they do, I sure hope it’s out of love, enjoyment and appreciation. Not because they think they owe me their lives.

Spotted at 14 weeks 2 days.

8am. My alarm rang. Far too early!

I nudged the husband who was still fast asleep. He woke up just long enough to murmur something unintelligible. I said, “Check-up today…..”. Still, murmurs.

I decided to let him continue sleeping. Made my way to the hospital, which is only 10 minutes drive from home.

The doctor wasn’t my regular obgyn. She’s some kind of detailed scan expert, very nice lady. Greeted me with a firm handshake and a smile, I loveeeeeeeeee women who are in control.

I got onto the examination bed and pulled my skirt down a little. Spider legs greeted my eyes, made a mental note to shave.

She squeezed cold gel onto my lower abdomen and stuck the scanning thingamajig onto my skin.

“You want to know the gender?”, she asked.

“Yes please!!”

But doctor was totally delaying my gratification. First, she showed me the baby’s skull and heart, could even see the heart chambers! Then she showed me the neck, fingers and toes.

# – Baby!

Finally, she showed me the private bits. “Can you see the triangle?”


“Congratulations, you’re having a boy.”


“Yes, 100%. In fact I will give you 101%”

# – Dudu at 14 weeks 2 days.

So happy to hear the news. While I wish Gareth was with me to hear it, but I think it’s a different good feeling to hear it by myself. Kind of like my own moment with the baby :)

I called Gareth immediately. He was still a bit groggy. I told him that we’re having a boy, and I must say the effect was better than a shot of espresso hehe.

Have we thought of a name? Yes. In fact, we’ve got 3 boy’s names and 2 girl’s names down since a couple of years ago, way before we were even planning to have babies.

We thought if it didn’t work out we could give them names to our dogs. Kidding!!!!

The day we found out.

This was written on  2.40am on 27 January 2014. I was sitting on my toilet bowl, emptying my bowel for the umpteenth time.


7 days ago on the morning of 20 January 2014. All those haziness, emotions, fatigue, sore breasts, suspicions and violent belly gas in the past weeks had culminated into a strong urge to head to the pharmacy.

I walked in, asked the pharmacist for folic acid. She asked me back, “For pregnancy?”.

“Hurm, guess so.”

“Ah…for pre-natal. Just one second”, she said.

She passed me a box with ‘FOLIC ACID’ brightly emblazoned across it.

“Take one a day, that’s all you need”.

I could have walked straight out. I could have walked straight to my car and driven home. But I didn’t.

Instead, I grabbed two boxes of ClearBlue. I was familiar with the contraption, having used it a couple of weeks ago when I suspected I was with child.

I paid up for my goods. While walking to the car I felt suspiciously eyed on. Felt like I was doing something naughty. What a weird feeling!

As soon as I reached home, I ripped open a box of ClearBlue and peed on it. And then I waited for what seemed like an eternity.


I waited a little bit more.

It still said, “Pregnant”.

I smiled. I ran up to our bedroom, flung the door open to my sleeping husband.


He roused and rubbed his eyes.


I couldn’t speak. I was smiling so hard, pee covered stick in my hand.

I turned on the lights and looked straight into his eyes, still smiling.

Then he noticed the stick in my hand. “Pregnant?”

“YES!!!!”, I roared.

And then I jumped right into his open arms and we hugged for the longest time.

We had a look at the stick again, by now it was showing how far a long I was; 3+ weeks.


We felt so good, so happy, so at peace because we know we are 100% ready.

Doctor confirmed it with a scan.

A couple of hours later, it began. The epic runs, the green tsunami, pissing from my ass – shit by any other name would still smell as bad.

Instead of morning sickness, instead of constipation…I got diarrhoea. And I was still at it 7 days later. As I spent most of my time on the throne, I decided to blog this.

So yes, Gareth and I – we are pregnant with our first child! :)


Today is 24 March 2014. The hubs has made the official announcement on Facebook and his blog yesterday.

We are now just over 13 weeks, entering 2nd trimester. Exciting times! Went through the morning sickness and had a bit of a scare but all is good now :)

I always thought women who suffer from morning sickness are drama queens, how can you projectile puke without warning?

Well, now I understand that you can. I have learnt to puke in my mouth and then swallowed it back multiple times because I didn’t want to be “that girl that projectile vomitted in a food court”. I have learnt to drive while hurling into a plastic bag.

Here’s the latest picture of our baby:

See the arm? We’ve got a raver!