Guilt-ridden for the furryball.

Charlie has been sleeping with us in the bedroom since Day 1 and recently me and the bf made a mutual decision to move his bed and pen to the living room. He’s just shedding too much and it’s very discouraging to find your bedroom covered in hair only one day after you have meticulously cleaned it.

Banished to the living room. See how emo he looks -_-

This morning would have marked the end of the 2nd night alone for Charlie. However, I opened the door to find him lying right outside our bedroom instead of in his pen. We still don’t know whether he opened the pen himself or whether we didn’t latch it properly the night before.

And then the smell hit me. He has pooped at the doorway and pissed right next to our sofa -_-

I was livid! But having him for more than a year already, I knew it’s too late to reprimand him because he wouldn’t understand what it’s for and will probably repeat his actions anyway. Dogs are not human beings…they have no concept of past or future, they live in the moment. So the only time to reprimand a dog is when you caught him or her in the act.

We made him go into his cage and took about 1/2 hour to clean up his mess. Got to admit, eversince I got Charlie, I’ve learnt to be more patient and responsible. When Charlie was a puppy he used to poop EVERYWHERE and it was pure HELL! I used to want to give him away almost every other day. Thankfully those soulful doe eyes had managed to stop me from doing that.

Well, it’s just not Charlie to poop/pee in the house and the only reason I can think of is that he was affected by the whole sleeping alone thing :(

The other day I was just chatting with the bf about my constant guilt towards Charlie and whether it was normal. You know, I work for long hours on the laptop everyday, so most often time I cannot provide Charlie with proper playtime. What he does is that he curls up in a corner or on my feet with his eyes closed while I tap away, only moving when I call his name or touch him. Of course I don’t totally ignore him…for every hour I’m on the laptop I’d cuddle or play with him for a couple of minutes etc but I still feel like it’s not enough. I don’t know if it’s Charlie’s face or what but whenever he gives me that bored or pained expression, a little bit of me inside dies.

Curled up like that, bored out of his wits.

The bf thinks I’m crazy for feeling guilty and there’s one thing he said that really made sense to me. Charlie has to grow up and we have to learn everyday not to live our lives around him, he should be the one living his life around us.

So sorry Charlie, you’re still sleeping alone tonight :(

#emocharlie has separation anxiety

Charlie my beloved mutt has separation anxiety. There, I’ve said it.

We spend RM300 every month just for a dogsitter to look after him on the weekends and I’ve basically given up on a full time job just so I could be with him on the weekdays (okay, I really do not like working full time also :P). Which explains why he has to be at the sitter on the weekends, because I need dog-free activities like eating at non-dog friendly restaurants, catching a movie etc.

Leaving him for a 1/2 hour alone would mean that he would be barking ferociously at the closed door for a full 30 minutes until I’m home. Though I don’t work full time, I need to go out to meet clients on the weekdays too and whenever this happens, I in turn become the one with the anxiety problems :P

Yesterday someone offered me 2 tickets to watch a new movie tonight and imagine how ridiculous I felt when I had to decline the tickets because my dog cannot be left alone?

My greatest fear is the neighbours complaining and eventually getting us into trouble but touch wood, that has not happened yet. A neighbour did voice out to us about a barking episode a while ago though. And I had strived to stop that from happening again.

English Cocker Spaniels are a great breed but they are infamous for being needy. They need constant human contact, very very affectionate animals. Something which I had no idea when I got Charlie. Trust me, if I had learnt to research on dogs’ characters before getting a dog, I would not have gotten him at all. I’d get a cat instead, JUST KIDDING! But alas, it’s fated and I have to live with my decision for at least 15 years :)

So anyway, due to Charlie’s separation anxiety, I’ve been avoiding going out at all. I know it’s unhealthy for me but to be honest I was pretty happy cooped up at home with just my dog.

Then suddenly, I was swamped with work and had to go out a couple of times a week. Luckily my friend, Ringo could look after him. Another time the bf took leave to do it.

But today…today I couldn’t find any help. So it’s just me and Charlie and then Charlie alone from 12.00pm – 4.30pm. Frankly, I was worried to death. I took a chance by leaving the wooden door open hoping he won’t feel so trapped in our tiny apartment.

And when I got home, he wasn’t barking which was not really a good sign as I had learnt because it probably meant that he’s exhausted from it. I decided to ring a neighbour’s doorbell and according to her, he didn’t bark but instead he howled. In fact he howled for a while like he’s asking for pity. Then I asked her whether the howling disturbed her and she answered, “Nope”.

At that very moment, I was filled with pride and happiness that you cannot possibly imagine. I guess leaving the wooden door opened really worked!

Yes, I have reached a new milestone with Charlie :)

And possibly getting my social life back!!!!!