How to get fat and farty. - Narcissism is Necessary

How to get fat and farty.

Can’t pick yourself up after a bad day? Eat this. Feeling fat and farty already? Even more reason to eat this. I call this dish “Fatty & Gassy TM”.

I got this recipe from John and while I think I’ve deviated a bit from his original idea, I think the dish turned up pretty good.

First up, you need the following ingredients to whip up this dish:

#1 – Rice enough for two people.

#2 – Baked beans. We prefer Heinz.

#3 – And the star of the dish – SPAM! Once this goes into your inbox, cannot delete one. Sorry, lame.

#4 – Olive oil because it’s healthier although there’s really no point for this dish.

Cook the rice however you like as long as the end result is white, fluffy rice. While the rice is cooking, start on the other ingredients.

#5 – Pop out the Spam.

#6 – Cut it into cubes and separate into two portions.

#7 – Now pop the beans into a pot. On medium heat till it kinda simmers, you definitely do not want to burn it.

#8 – Pop one portion of Spam into the baked beans and mix it up.

#9 – You’ll get this disgusting baked beans and Spam concoction which smells kinda heavenly if you’re into that sort of thing.

Time to deal with the other portion of Spam. Now, pick one cube up and pop it into your mouth. Chew. Swallow. Repeat.

Just kidding!

#10 – Heat up some olive oil in a pan.

#11 – Dump the remaining Spam into the oil. Brown the Spam cubes on all sides.

#12 – Till they become like this. Like croutons, only instead of bread they’re made up of lard and pork meat.

#13 – Remove Spam cubes from pan and drain oil.

And you’re almost done!

Scoop a bowl of rice, dump it onto the plate. Then pour baked beans + Spam mixture over the rice. Lastly, sprinkle Spam croutons all over. Just like this:

#14 – Tadaa!

#15 – A closeup of Fatty & Gassy TM. YUMMY!

Till later, poot poot.

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16 Responses to How to get fat and farty.

  1. pinkpau September 28, 2009 at 8:21 pm #

    my newly acquired dorm-kitchen-cooking stomach and tastebuds approve!! :D must try this recipe

  2. Ms. Bloom September 28, 2009 at 9:06 pm #

    This is soul food! I know SPAM is probably as bad/worse than McD’s but its divine!

  3. Jess September 28, 2009 at 9:14 pm #

    looks delicious!!!!

  4. Tan Yee Hou September 29, 2009 at 2:13 am #

    eh olive oil not healthy cos it cannot be charred/boiled.

    that’s what i heard.

  5. Justin Koh September 29, 2009 at 4:26 am #

    That’s what my mum always do!

    I cooked it once for my friends and they said they’ve never seen anyone cook SPAM with baked beans before. I thought it’s a common dish. Apparently not. LOL

  6. CraSH September 29, 2009 at 7:19 am #

    you could add onions and fried eggs to your beans. but you do not need oil, just fry the spam and its natural oil will brown itself. here is how i do mine….

    fry a couple eggs and break the yolk. make sure it cook it thoroughly, then break the egg into small pieces with your spatula. add anions and cubed spam and brown them without adding any additional oil… then add beans, siracha (for spice) some sugar and pepper. minimal utensils used. =)

  7. KY September 29, 2009 at 2:42 pm #

    it’s all oily, dirty and awesome! lovesss it

  8. Kimberlycun September 29, 2009 at 2:48 pm #

    ah pau: good luck!!

    ms bloom: actually think it’s prolly worse thanks to the salt content haha

    jess: thanks!

    yee hou: really!!! hm i need to read up on this and warn my folks

    justin: my mom cooks it too! but she always add garlic and egg which gives off a kinda oriental vibe (or maybe it does because i’ve been having it since young therefore it’s chinese :P). i guess it’s not as common as we think haha

    crash: that’s exactly how my mom makes it! delish :)

    ky: cook it!

  9. Cheesie September 29, 2009 at 4:09 pm #

    omfg yummy! ya i heard too, olive oil is not good for extreme heat.

    • Kimberlycun September 29, 2009 at 4:41 pm #

      ringo: wtf scary why i never heard of this b4 one -_-

  10. Janediva September 29, 2009 at 5:51 pm #

    I can already imagine the taste of it!! *salivates*

    • Kimberlycun September 29, 2009 at 8:12 pm #

      jane: i want to make it again haha

  11. aylien September 30, 2009 at 3:18 am #

    hey kim, fyi

    looks like regular olive oil is ok, but stay away from extra virgin olive oil for frying

    • Kimberlycun September 30, 2009 at 12:30 pm #

      aylien: thanks for the link! oh it’s just the boiling point difference nothing to do with health. phew.

  12. pj October 2, 2009 at 10:36 am #


  13. Myhorng October 4, 2009 at 12:47 pm #

    fried spam looks tasty.. yum

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