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Jizzgasmic Pork Meatballs Pasta

Honestly, I’m not a big fan of meatballs. The ones sold outside tend to be too dense or too dry or too bland. My other half, on the other hand, is a meatball connoisseur. He likes ’em small, big, juicy, cheesy, loosely stuffed or even dense. Yeah, he loves his meatballs.

And because he loves meatballs, and I love him, so I decided to make him his beloved meatballs for dinner….with a tiny wee bit of Asian twist. I decided to make ones that I think I might like – not too dense and very crunchy on the inside.

The ingredients that you need are:

  • 300+ grams of minced pork
  • 200ml of bread crumbs (you can use store bought ones, but mine are homemade by the bf’s mom. If you’re feeling adventurous, check out how to make breadcrumbs here)
  • 3-4 strands of long beans (kacang panjang)
  • 1 chilli
  • 1.5 tablespoon of dried basil (or fresh ones, you lucky bastard)
  • 1 can of plum tomatoes
  • 1 tablespoon of brown sugar (or ordinary sugar)
  • some vodka (or white wine or even water if you’ve got no choice -_-)
  • celery salt/ordinary salt + pepper
  • 3 tablespoon of minced garlic
  • pasta of your choice

Oh and having a mixing bowl is very useful for this recipe!

Lets start!

# – Dice one onion, throw into mixing bowl.

# – Dice long beans and throw onto diced onions.

# – Dice chilli and throw onto diced onions on top of diced onions.

# – Pour bread crumbs into your bowl of onions, long beans and chilli mix.

# – Now chuck minced pork into the mix.

# – Add 1.5 tablespoon of dried basil. Of course, you can use fresh ones!

# – And next, about one tablespoon of celery salt, of which you can replace with 1/2 a tablespoon of ordinary salt. But seriously, I don’t think I can live without celery salt ever again!

# – Lastly, a generous sprinkling of coarse black pepper.

Now here comes the FUN part!

# – With your naked fingers, squeeze and mix everything till combined :)

And because it’s impossible to take pictures while shaping meatballs, I’ll skip the process :P

# – With slightly moist hands, just roll about a tablespoon and a half of mixture and form a ball. They should look like this :D

# – Now heat up oil in a saucepan and pan fry the balls!

# – After about a minute, turn them around so they’re evenly cooked.

# – Remove from saucepan when the meat has turned white.

# – Be gentle while handling your balls, or they will disintegrate like this :(

# – But do not worry, just squash the damaged ball into smithereens and incorporate it into the sauce ;)

# – Now there will be a lot of onions, bits and bobs left in the pan after the frying. DO NOT DISCARD them. Instead, pour some vodka in. (BTW, right after this picture was taken, I flambe-d my own hand…do not handle the camera while pouring alcohol into your cooking at the same time…it is stupid. Very stupid)

# – Scrap all burnt goodies from the pan and add some minced garlic into the mix.

# – In the meantime, open a can of plum tomatoes and cut them into smaller pieces if they’re not already cut.

# – Pour the tomatoes into your garlicky awesomesauce. Mix well.

# – Add one tablespoon of brown sugar or ordinary sugar. Stir well.

# – And now….add the balls back into the sauce, baybeh!

# – Gently stir them around a bit so they’re well coated by the tomato sauce.

# – Now this recipe is enough for 3 people although 2 of us managed to clear it…so cook pasta for 3. Any pasta, I used a combo of angelhair and spaghetti, just because.

# – Drain pasta, spoon sauce and balls over pasta and slice cheddar over it. Yes, I’m using a potato peeler, don’t judge!

# – Behold, the Jizzgasmic Pork Meatballs Pasta.

# – A look into the ball.

# – Trust me, this is the way to a man’s heart, the Jizzgasmic Pork Meatballs Pasta.

This is also by far the best dish I’ve ever whipped up on my own. I shouldn’t use expletives in a supposedly family friendly post but yeah, this shit is fucking A.

Posted in: Homemade Recipes, Pork - Continue Reading

Kim’s Mom’s vegetable curry with no curry.

I love this vegetable curry! The recipe was conceived by my Mom and when I asked her for it, I was so surprised by its simplicity.

There’s no fancy curry powder or spices involved and best of all, the ingredients needed are ridiculously cheap. You can make a massive pot and eat it from morning to supper :D

# – Cast of characters – A bowl of peeled and chopped potatoes, a bowl of diced onions, some fried tofu (if you like them), chopped ladies fingers, chopped long beans, chopped cabbage, chopped garlic, 2 or 3 stalks of lemongrass, half a handful of curry leaves, 1 cut red chilli with seeds removed, a small carton of coconut milk and most importantly….chilli paste (chili boh/cili giling)! Oh! And eggs and 1 chicken cube (not pictured).

# – Heat some oil in a big pot and fry up the onions, garlic, curry leaves, lemongrass, chillies and chilli paste till fragrant. If you’re not very good at eating spicy food, don’t get too heavy can always add more chili paste later for kick, but you can’t reduce it.

# – In the meantime, boil up some eggs. You’d need them hard boiled.

# – Add water to the pot till slightly more than half of bowl.

# – Now add the chicken cube into the chilli mixture and stir till completely dissolved.

# – Throw in fried tofu and potatoes.

# – Then add in all the vegetables – cabbage, ladies fingers & long beans. You can add other vegetables that you like too though preferably they are good for stewing/long period of cooking. Now boil till the cabbage are wilted and have absorbed all the taste.

Generally, just use your feeling with this dish. If it looked a bit dry, add water + salt. If it has too much water…boil longer till it reduces. Remember to taste along while it’s cooking, if too spicy or salty, add more water. If not spicy enough or too bland, add more chili paste!

# – After boiling for a while and about 3 minutes before serving, pour in the coconut milk and mix.

# – Wah, so serious! I should probably dress nicer from now on when I cook :P

# – Chuck in the hard boiled eggs now. Please, please peel them first.

# – Hmmmmmmmm.

# – Serve with rice.

With piping hot rice, it makes for a delicious and satisfying meal especially on a cold, rainy evening. But I can’t resist eating it on its own also :P

Happy cooking!

Posted in: Vegetarian - Continue Reading